[PSUBS-MAILIST] Nasal Pearls, Grasshoppers and Pirates

["Mark Steed" <plutomark@mail.astate.edu>]

Carl-you ain't gonna believe it but he is supposedly from a town in Arkansas nearby according to the "Weekly World News" report. Don't believe I'll look him up. This is the same grocery store aisle journalism giant that ran the story about 4 foot grasshoppers taking over Texas. They also say 18th Century pirates are still operating in the Carib. Sea. Maybe we should sic the giant grasshoppers on them. Regards, Mark


---------- Original Message ----------------------------------
From: Coalbunny <coalbunny@vcn.com>
Reply-To: personal_submersibles@psubs.org
Date:  Wed, 27 Nov 2002 08:22:04 -0700

>Hey Mark, you got the addy of that guy?  I could use some pearls.  :)
>Carl
>
>
>Mark Steed wrote:
>> 
>> Michael-You and I read the same article. Mine was in the "Weekly World News". They had a story about a man that grew a pearl in his nasal cavities as well. Regards, Mark Steed
>> 
>> ---------- Original Message ----------------------------------
>> From: Michael B Holt <tlohm@juno.com>
>> Reply-To: personal_submersibles@psubs.org
>> Date:  Tue, 26 Nov 2002 11:32:23 -0500
>> 
>> >
>> > Iraqi Submarine Prowling Lake Michigan
>> > Friday November 22, 2002
>> >
>> > DETROIT, Mich. -- Fiendish Iraqi terrorists are lurking beneath Lake
>> > Michigan in one or more mini-submarines, poised to launch a deadly
>> >attack
>> > on America, a military insider warns.
>> >
>> > "We know they're down there but we don't know exactly where," claims the
>> > U.S. Navy source, who spoke on the condition of anonymity.
>> >
>> > "That lake is larger than the entire state of Israel and the sub is
>> >quite
>> > small, making it extremely difficult to detect on sonar.
>> >
>> > "But the frightening thing is that between natural waterways,
>> >underground
>> > rivers and man-made canals, Lake Michigan is linked to all the other
>> >Great
>> > Lakes -- it's all one big water system.
>> >
>> > "That puts the terrorists in a perfect position to launch an amphibious
>> > sneak attack on any one of at least six states, including Minnesota,
>> > Wisconsin, Ohio, Illinois, Pennsylvania and New York.
>> >
>> > "And if they access the Erie Canal, that would take them to the Hudson
>> > River and enable them to strike at New York City."
>> >
>> > The subs that have been spotted so far are similar in design to Japanese
>> > mini-subs which can carry up to six passengers and stay submerged for
>> >days
>> > at a time.
>> >
>> > Authorities have intercepted transmissions that seem to be coming from
>> >the
>> > mini-subs, with voices speaking in Arabic. Translators have interpreted
>> > the voices saying, "The Iron Fish are ready to bite."
>> >
>> > The Bush administration is keeping the crisis under wraps to avoid
>> > nationwide panic, the source claims.
>> >
>> > "The White House is weighing its options because, at this point, they're
>> > not sure how many subs might be down there. There could be dozens of
>> >these
>> > things," notes the Navy man. "If we start carpet-bombing the Great Lakes
>> > with depth charges -- which is what it may take to get these SOBs --
>> > people may feel the war has come to their own back yards."
>> >
>> > The spokesman stressed that these subs are too small to carry nuclear
>> > weapons, but added, "They could still be smuggling in nuclear materials
>> >to
>> > manufacture weapons of mass destruction right here in the U.S."
>> >
>> > Navy SEALS have been searching Lake Michigan, but they've found no sign
>> >of
>> > any mini-subs so far. But civilian sightings of the subs have continued
>> >at
>> > an alarming rate.
>> >
>> > "I was fishing off my boat early one morning," one local fisherman says,
>> > "and I hooked something so big,
>> >
>> > I thought maybe I had caught the Lake Michigan monster. I tried to reel
>> >it
>> > in, but then I saw a periscope come up. You can't even begin to imagine
>> >my
>> > surprise when I found out I'd hooked a mini-sub."
>> >
>> > The fisherman dropped his rod in the water and raced back to shore as
>> >fast
>> > as his boat would carry him.
>> >
>> > "I'm lucky I got out of there alive," he says. "That thing could've
>> >blown
>> > my boat to smithereens."
>> >
>> > One witness claims to have seen a mini-sub on the Michigan side of the
>> > lake at the exact same time his friend on the Wisconsin side saw a
>> >different
>> > one.
>> >
>> > "That means there could be hundreds of terrorists, hiding beneath our
>> > lakes,  just waiting to launch an attack on our shores," one insider
>> >says.
>> >
>> > It is not known how the Iraqis transported the sub into Lake Michigan.
>> > "They could've built it right in Michigan, or they may have built it
>> >outside the
>> > country and sailed it in. God knows there are enough raw materials in
>> > Detroit to build a fleet of mini-subs."
>> >
>> > The sub's stealth capabilities and the murky depths of the
>> >925-foot-deep,
>> > 307-mile-long Lake Michigan have made it extremely difficult to locate.
>> >
>> > One expert notes, "We don't know exactly what those terrorists are doing
>> > in our lakes but one thing we do know is that they're not out
>> >joy-riding, and
>> > they're not offering to take people out for submarine rides."
>> >
>> > The expert ends with an ominous warning: "If we don't do something about
>> > those subs soon, we'll be in big trouble."
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> >--
>> >
>> >
>> >________________________________________________________________
>> >Sign Up for Juno Platinum Internet Access Today
>> >Only $9.95 per month!
>> >Visit www.juno.com
>> >
>> 
>> 
>> 
>
>-- 
>"You delight not in a city's seven or seventy wonders, but in an answer
>it gives to a question of yours, or the question it asks you, forcing
>you to answer, like Thebes through the mouth of the Sphinx." -- Kublai
>Khan
>